Here's the thing though: the hymen doesn't work like that. At all. So whatever is going on down there is worrisome.
Definition of the hymen via Google: a membrane that partially closes the opening of the vagina and whose presence is traditionally taken to be a mark of virginity.
Quotes:"He stirred the one inside her. She was too tight, her maidenhead getting in the way. “This needs to go.”
“What . . . what are you talking about? That’s starting to hurt, Lothaire.” He was hurting her? He wanted to. He was obsessing about her more than his revenge, more than his vows. Something is wrong with me. I despise her kind! He began forcing a second finger into her. Holding her gaze, he commanded her, “Take it, Elizabeth. Take them deep.” When he’d wedged both inside, spreading them, her tears welled. “You can’t.”
“I can! Your maidenhead’s mine.” He drew his fingers out, thrusting them back in. “Please stop . . .” She scrambled back, but he pinned his free hand over her neck. Her head fell to the side, her eyes squeezed shut. Elizabeth couldn’t be his. I did not subject my fragile female to death row for half a decade. Of course it wasn’t her. He wouldn’t have taken his Bride’s virginity with a crude thrust of his fingers. . . ."
-Kresley Cole, Lothaire, Immortal Series
Her nails dug into my shoulders as I lifted her up a little bit and tried to push all the way in. I swore and she froze as there was something most definitely in the way, but my momentum was too great and I had her too keyed up to stop. She snapped her wide eyes to mine as her mouth made a little O of surprised pain as I glared down at her.
-Crownover, Jay: Rule: A Marked Men Novel
I'm sure there's more I am just forgetting. See how they're talking about some weird barrier in their lady bits? I'd have some serious questions as to how these ladies have their periods. Although if you think about it though book characters only have their periods when they're pregnant or rather they only worry about periods when they're not having them. Maybe female characters just have crazy weird vaginas with some weird super hymen that prevents them from having periods.
Here are what some websites say in case you're thinking I'm so totally cray cray in a bad way.
You have a cherry that “pops” after you first have sexOK, so while this one should be abundantly clear to anyone who has a vagina, there are so many Yahoo answers questions about “popping [your] cherry” that it’s apparently still worth addressing.
So just to be clear: There is no such thing as a “cherry” that’s “popped” when you have intercourse for the first time. There is such thing as a hymen, which is a thin membrane across the opening of the vaginal canal. But not every woman is born with a hymen, and the hymen does not necessarily break after a woman has intercourse for the first time. In fact, it’s fairly common for a woman with a semi-active lifestyle to have broken her hymen long before having sex. (So if you didn’t bleed the first time you had sex, as countless romance novels and your older cousin warned you would happen, that’s probably why.)
Back in the olden days, when women did nothing but sit around in their hoop skirts and play the harp and try to not get cholera, "breaking the hymen" was much more of a thing. But now that ladies are actually allowed to do things like walk around in public and vote and ride bikes, your hymen (if you even had one to begin with) was likely done for long before your first sexual experience.
-Also to go off of this if you think about "back in the old days" of when some girls started having sex, it was right after their first period. I don't know about you but for me that was when I was like 11 years old. Think about some old perv having sex with an eleven year old and there were probably thousands of other reasons for blood after sex the first time and a hymen breaking. Just a thought to haunt your dreams.
The myth: Your "cherry pops" after you have sex.The truth: First of all, there is literally nothing that "pops" when you have sex for the first time. Boyle says she's not a fan of this term (Who is?), and adds that while "the hymen, or the band of tissue in the back part of the vagina often will tear and bleed during the first time you have intercourse, many women will have hymenal tear from gymnastics, tampons, horseback riding, biking, or dancing." So even when a hymen does tear, it's not always a first-time-sex-related thing.
What’s a hymen?Funny word, right? The hymen is a thin, fleshy tissue that stretches across part of the opening of the vagina.
The hymen can be stretched open the first time a girl has vaginal sex, which might cause some pain or bleeding. And despite what you may have heard, the hymen cannot grow back once it's been stretched open.
Some people, and some cultures, believe that a woman whose hymen has been stretched open is no longer a virgin. But having a hymen and being a virgin are not the same thing. There are other ways that a hymen can be stretched open, by inserting something into the vagina (like a tampon or a finger) riding a bicycle, or doing sports. And some girls are born with so little hymenal tissue that it seems like it was never there.
1. No one really knows why female are born with hymens.
All we know is that they are. At birth, the doughnut-shaped membrane is prominent and thick, but that changes pretty rapidly.
2. Hymenal tissue is usually worn away by adolescence.
During the early years, the membrane thins and widens as a result of athletics, self-exploration, cleansing and even activities as simple as walking. A little of the tissue may remain around the opening of the vagina, but that's usually it. Which means…
3. Pain experienced by some women during their first time having intercourse isn't because the hymen is breaking.
That urban legend you've most likely heard about? It was actually a big ol' myth. Most of the membrane is already worn away when a woman finally has intercourse, and plays little to no role in discomfort.
Many girls believe their initial sexual experience is inevitably unpleasant because that is what they've been told, so it is. It makes sense when you think about it. When we think something will hurt, we feel anxious and tense which ultimately gives way to pain.
4. Those "bloody sheets" aren't because the hymen is tearing, either.
Most young partners are not experienced love-makers. Those first times are usually less skilled and sensual, and more trial and error. Hurried, a poorly lubricated vagina or rough sex can cause sensitive vaginal tissue to bleed, but not hymenal tissue to break.
5. Intact hymenal membrane doesn't cover the whole vaginal opening.
If it did, girls who still had bits of the hymen left at puberty could not menstruate properly.
6. About 1 in 200 women have an "imperforate" hymen.
That means around 0.5 percent of hymens don't wear away normally and have openings too small for tampons or erections to comfortably enter the vagina. These days, those cases require a fairly simple surgery to snip away some of the membrane. Hooray for modern medicine, right?
7. Historically, people have gone to great lengths to prove that the hymen broke after marriage.
In old cultures, families expected newlyweds to hand over bloody sheets after the wedding night to confirm that the hymen had ripped, make sure the woman was a virgin and check that the two had consummated the union. A little nosy, don't you think? Many brides didn't even risk it, they would simply cut the inside of their thighs with a sharp fingernail to soil the sheets — just in case.
To continue on this idea of what all these lovely quotes just stated: the hymen is more like:
A lovely (maybe) balloon arch
and not so much like
football players breaking through a banner.
There's no penis charging through your hymen to get to the rest of your vagina. However, if this is the case for you please let a doctor know.
Here are the links of where I got this lovely information:
Here's a video in case you're more of a visual auditory person. It's super funny and explains how the hymen works. This is also where I found out about the hymen so feel free to enjoy!
My big question here is if it's so easy to find this information (and it is, just type in hymen myths and you'll find thousands of links) then why are authors messing with my vagina making me think there was a weird barrier down there? Do you think it comes from our odd conception of virginity and what it means to be a virgin? Is it that after sex we have a little blood and think "oh there's my hymen!"? Could it be that we as women aren't too sure what's going on in our downstairs mix-up? I would like your thoughts.
Now sadly after knowing this and seeing the video it is super-de-duper odd for me to read books with breaking hymens. So sorry ahead of time if this is also the case for you.
Thank you all for whoever reads this and let me know what you're thoughts are in the comments!! Have a great rest of your weekend.